Do you ever find yourself wondering where your life is going? I’ve been doing that alot lately. My birthday is coming up and I typically treat it as a new year.
A time for new beginnings. Most people do this at the calendar new year but I like to have things in my life match up a little better. This time last year I was irrevocably infatuated with a particular screen star, who I won’t name here, as many women are. This infatuation led me on a wonderful holiday journey and got me thru what had been a really difficult summer. I am unfortunately still enamored with this celebrity but I’m doing my best to wean myself off our imaginary romance. (Even though I have the feeling it’s really rather good for me)
So this year I am feeling like I have much less purpose. As I enter my mid thirties with much less accomplished than I had hoped for when I was in my early twenties, I find myself feeling decidedly lost.
How does one remain focused on long term goals when them seem so very far away.
My day to day struggles are essentially the same, but as time goes on I find myself with fewer reasons to have hope for achieving goals and overcoming difficulties in life.
I must admit, I sound rather whiney, even to myself.
But if I don’t let it out it’ll only make me feel worse! Sorry if I got it on you.
I am remembering a motivational poster that hung in an office I no longer work at. A christopher Reeves quote about the inevitability of reaching goals when you remained determined.
I am doing my best to change my inner dialogue to “I always get what I want” because it used to be the opposite.
I am also trying not to ruminate on the social injustice that I can’t help but feel enraged about. I am doing the best that I can with the tools that I have and that’s all I can ask if myself.
Alrighty then…. let’s go do that….